Faith.

First of all.  A huge happy father's day to the best daddy in the world!  don't fret, i will be doing a things I love about my dad post, but not tonight.  Tonight I have felt the need to post many more thoughts from my head concerning faith.

Right before I went into the MTC, Elder Neil L. Anderson gave a talk entitled "You Know Enough".  Throughout my mission, this talk became a faith builder for me.  When I felt like I had to do hard things, I would remind myself that I know enough.  I went through leaving a boy behind for my mission, training my second transfer, writing that boy off, training again, white washing, training, "dead" areas, friends making awful horrific decisions back home, training, and being absolutely terrified of going home.  I feel that missionaries learn about faith.  Their own faith, how to develop faith, how to help others find faith, etc.

I have talked to many a sister missionary about her decision to serve a mission.  Reasons vary.  Counsel from leaders vary.  I had a Bishop in Idaho who as I was preparing to put in my papers made sure I checked with God every step of the way to make sure I wasn't supposed to get married first.  When I came home, that same Bishop guided me through my coming home process, including crying with me when everything didn't seem to fall into place as it is "supposed to".

I heard it best described last week by a friend of mine when she was talking about her decision to serve.  Friends get married while you're gone.  And as she put it, she was following the "unmarried plan".  And as I've thought about it this last week, that's really what it is.

It takes faith to live the single life.  More so for girls than for boys I think.  I think for boys it takes more faith to commit to have and provide for a family.  I don't know how it is for all LDS girls obviously, but I feel like most want to get married.  And most sooner rather than later.  I met girls at school who's sole purpose in going to school was to find a man.  I have seen girls who wait around for the "right" man.

For me, I am living my "unmarried plan".  Who knew that I would serve a mission?  I can tell you all my friends from my stake back home would never have believed it.  They thought I would be engaged my first semester at school.  Who knew I would graduate from school?  And then what?  If I was married, the plan would be to raise my family where ever my husband was.  We would make those decisions together with the Lord.  What I and he would major in, where we would go after college, what jobs to take, etc.  But for now, it's me and my faith in God.  Where do I go?  What do I do?

And so I am here, "living the dream" as so many people tell me.  Is it really how I dreamed my life would be?  Absolutely not.  Do I make the best of everyday?  I certainly try.  Do I have a spectacular job with awesome roommates and a good ward?  Yeah.  Do I make plans for my "unmarried plan"?  Yes.  Does it take faith?  Yes.